It's a heavy thing. It weighs you down, and you often carry it everywhere.
I suffer from mommy guilt about many things. Having jumped head first into parenting with kids who were already 3 and 4, I'm learning as I go, and I am notorious for comparing myself to other moms. Ya know, the ones who gave birth to their children and have been doing this for 3+ years and have figured out how to manage their schedules with children. Because that seems logical in that moment.
In all reality- my kids watch too much TV, I lose my patience all the time. I spend too much time on the computer/cell phone because I'm stressed out, and I feel guilty because we spend a good amount of time at home, when I would rather be out doing things.
And those articles on parenting websites? They don't help. They make you feel like you are always making the wrong choice. Whether it be about what school to send them to, what carseat to buy, what food to feed them, and how you should arrange your schedule.
Today I choose to believe that my kids won't die from watching TV. That my sanity is important in their lives as well as my own, and that as long as I find a good balance, they will understand and they will get the attention they crave and deserve. I choose to believe that I don't have to be perfect, and that comparing myself to other moms will only lead me to destruction.
Of course, I will probably start the destructive cycle over again tomorrow, because every good mom I know suffers from Mommy guilt. But today, I'm giving myself a pass. And you too!
Lord, please help me to find balance in my life and not feel guilt when there is no need to. I thank you for all of my beautiful children, and I pray that you help me to do what is best for them, no matter what the circumstance.
Don't compare yourself to other mommies! You know what, maybe that's what works for them and their families, but this is YOUR family and you have to find what works for YOU.
ReplyDeleteThat's how I always look at this mommy war stuff... it makes no sense to me. What's right for one family isn't going to be right for another.
And if something you're doing with your family is bothering you, don't beat yourself up about it. Make a plan to change it, and try your hardest. It's no use getting upset unless it's something you can't change, right?
Hang in there, and don't be so hard on yourself, okay? Those other parents don't have it all together, because I tell you what... none of us do!
It doesn't matter if you gave birth or adopted, you still compare yourself to other moms! It's so annoying to see other moms who are so perfect and their kids are perfect blah blah blah! lol So don't worry about it, You are being the best mom that you can be and that's all that matters!
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